One Smile a Day... - The humor thread.

[Caduceus Mercurius]

eeeeeee :lol:

 

[ararat]

 

[Forkbender]

There are two general types of yoga.

1. YOGA FROM INDIA

AND


2. YOGA FROM MERTHYR TYDFIL

 

[IJesusChrist]

HAHA.

"So a girl invites her new boyfriend to sleep over for the night, for the first time. The night goes well, but the guy doesn't make a move, and eventually the girl says good night, rolls over, but doesn't get to bed. The guy about an hour after this proceeds to slowly roll her over on her back and begins to have sexual intercourse with his lady. She starts to moan and say "Oh yes!" and the guy responds with "Oh you're awake"?"
True story, in some column in the newspaper...

Here is a VERY bad joke:

I was looking out over my lawn from my bedroom window the other day, I had dug a hole for a fence post the previous day, and was admiring my great work. It was then that I saw my neighbor lurk over to my yard suspiciously and start filling my hole with water. I tisked, and said to myself "It's ok, he means well."

This joke will grow on you, I promise

 

[Forkbender]

The 9 stupidest products ever

 

[Forkbender]

The 9 Craziest Japanese Ads Ever

This one's even better.

 

[TheBarn]

cATs

 

[Forkbender]

:lol: until the music kicks in. Where the fuck is Bob Saget?

 

[TheBarn]

yeah, I know what you mean, in the UK its Harry Hill though

 

[Forkbender]

Is he better than Bob Saget?

 

[TheBarn]

that all depends on your style of humour...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGpp9NP4 ... re=related

 

[IJesusChrist]

What does he say I can't understand him.

So a baby seal walked into a club.

Horse walks into a bar, OUCH.

A jew, a polish man, a rabi, and a priest walk into a bar, what is this, some kind of joke?

What did helen keller name her dog?
GFLabooolgrablaka

Why did hellen kellers dog jump off a cliff? You would too if your name was GFLabooolgrablaka.

What do hellen kellers parents do to punish her? Rearrange the furniture, or put a plunger in the toilet.


I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

 

[TheBarn]

he says

the problem with heroin...

the real problem.. ..hmmmm. ...mmmm

the real problem with heroin is....

its very morish

oooo.... morish

 

[IJesusChrist]

Morish?

 

[greenwizard]

morish

A food that instills a desire to continue to eat more and more of it; addictive.

 

[Forkbender]

I'm not entirely sure if this is funny...

 

[Forkbender]

 

[TheBarn]

ok, not sure if you have seen this...if not, you will all love it

 

[Henkfloyd]

Not sure if this one is mentioned before, but I really love it.

Charlie the Unicorn:

part 1

part 2

part 3

Ring ring.

 

[random]

The paradox

Suddenly, after many years searching for an answer, an entity got it touch with human kind to tell them the truth about life. And it said: "You people, that search for an answer for the reality wich you perceive. Let this be told. And remember that I am just a part of yourselfs, like you are of mine. There is no God. There is you. And me, you and us is all that is. There's happenings and there's choices. We are both."

That was it. The divine manifestation of ourselfs.

Just after that event, out of the blue, comes one person very excited and screams out loud: "I told you there was a God!!"


- random