GODbye

[Caduceus Mercurius]

The reason why I want to know whether you all read the first posts by Daniel is that it contained a lot of assumptions about my private life, including my own thought processses and trip experiences. Part of a civilized solution of this conflict would be that we go over all these misgivings one by one, but to do that I'd have to get even more personal than I've already been, which I don't feel like doing in an atmosphere of distrust and hostility.

 

[Caduceus Mercurius]

CM > you crossed the line BIG time by taking things in your own hand. You refuse to admit that. You refuse to apologize. You keep defending your action while nobody agrees with you.

Yes, I crossed the line. And I understand nobody agrees with me. I will no longer defend my action. I apologize. I apologize to all members whom I've wronged. I feel embarrassed about it. It was silly. Maybe I could have handled it differently. It felt like the right thing to do, but I guess it's also true I didn't do it the right way. Sorry.

 

[Psychoid]

Now, Tiax and Psychoid, why are you so hostile?
What in the world could be so incredibly upsetting to get you guys off your rockers so bad?
CM wasn't very tactile, ok... it wasn't a wise thing to do to take matters into his own hands, but that doesn't mean that all of a sudden he's an enemy. I understand the point where you think he is wrong, but in the end, is there a right or wrong? Isn't it so that there's just situations, actions, reactions and opinions? And how is a negative reaction helping to solve the situation?
In fact, the only reason there's still a situation is because you are still allowing it to be.

Why am I upset? Can't you guess by reading my posts and CM's posts? Caduceus still thinks what he did was right, keeps minimizing it, didn't really apologize, still doesn't take responsiblity for what he did, and keeps lying.

I was exaggerating with the video thing, I admit it. I am ready to accept apologies from you CM, but a more sincere, complete, precise and exhaustive one. Not just a little "I'm sorry for the people I disturbed, I won't do it again".

That doesn't mean you will get my trust back though. I'll always be suspicious about the way this forum is run because of you. And if I ever have a proof that you have even a minimal power here, direct or indirect, I'm off for good.

Those who say "forgive & forget" haven't really thought about the consequences of such thinking. If everyone thought like that we would never evolve and keep making the same mistakes.
Forgive: Yes, if the person recognizes his mistake and honestly apologizes for it. When the person says he didn't do anything wrong and doesn't apologies, then that person is an idiot and that should never be tolerated.
Forget: Never. How can we learn if we forget? In the present case, forgetting means exposing us to the possibility of this happenning again, and I don't think anyone would want this.

GOD and CM…

This starts to become pretty painful. I see a great forum being destroyed because of this. Members are leaving and I doubt if there are any new ones recently. You play both a negative role in that matter.

GOD > you have been a pain in the ass a lot of times for a lot of people (understatement).
CM > you crossed the line BIG time by taking things in your own hand. You refuse to admit that. You refuse to apologize. You keep defending your action while nobody agrees with you.

You’re both intelligent, so both of you will realize that what you’re doing now, is not working. Please do something about it. One way or the other, but don’t continue to destroy this forum because of your own little oochiegoochie problem with somebody else.

I agree on this.

For the record: CM does not have any ‘power’ on this forum, and that’s including ‘hidden power’ as Psychoid suggested.

How do you know this?





About Daniel's posts, I have read them, and although it could be said to go against the diffamatory rule, it shouldn't bother you too much since you've done the same thing over and over again. And it's not like he said false things...

 

[Psychoid]

When I say "a more sincere, complete, precise and exhaustive one [apology]."

I'm also asking for you to publicly explain in detail exactly what you did, how you did it, why you did it, the chronology and how you felt throughout the process.

 

[Mycophile]

For the record: CM does not have any ‘power’ on this forum, and that’s including ‘hidden power’ as Psychoid suggested.

How do you know this?

Something to do with lunch. There's really no reason to be paranoid there...

 

[Psychoid]

"I crossed the line."
What do you mean?


"I will no longer defend my action."
Why?


"I apologize to all members whom I've wronged."
Some people were more involved that others and I think they deserve to be named.


"I feel embarrassed about it."
Why and how?


"It was silly."
Nice euphemism


"Maybe I could have handled it differently."
Could?


"I guess it's also true I didn't do it the right way."
Why wasn't it the right way? What would have been a right way?

 

[Mycophile]

Come on Psychoid. Give Caduceus a break.

I know he feels bad about this situation. You know that. What do you want to hear? Must Caduceus write another long story? Another discussion?

Caduceus has done way more for the psychonaut community then anybody out there. He made a mistake. Give him some credits. It's dealt with. Over.

And if GOD can be a little bit more respectful then he used to be, I would be very happy if he came back. Come on GOD, you can do it.

 

[st.bot.32]

I'm glad we're keeping the flaming+name calling down..that's how it should be. I agree that being willing to move on is important, but we have to work to get there. If people can express their feelings first, without getting into an argument, taking a deep breath when we read something that we find bothersome and realize it's not a flame, it's just someone else's honest reaction.. that's a start. Keep it coming, keep it level. Remember, there's enough blame to go around. Goal: Let's work this out and get back to what this forum is all about, right?

And GOD, I agree with space here. It's not about arse licking it's about acknowledging that there are more constructive ways to go about saying the exact same thing. This isn't guantanamo bay, it's a humble but lovely web forum, we all are human, we err, we misinterpret, we do the best we can.

If this sounds like group therapy (haha) well yes it is. It's come to that. We all need to pop some virtual E (or at least pass around a king size doobie), hang out and have a sincere chitchat then get back to business... err.. fun, growth, exploration and all of that

 

[Psychoid]

"Come on Psychoid. Give Caduceus a break. "
Ill give him a well deserved break once I am satisfied.

"I know he feels bad about this situation. You know that."
No. That's exactly the point. He doesn't give me the impression to feel bad about it, except for the part where people disagreed with what he did.

"What do you want to hear?"
I've already asked for everything I want to hear, some things I have asked several times, with no answers.

"Must Caduceus write another long story? Another discussion? "
Not another long story. THE long story. The objective, complete and real one.

"Give him some credits. It's dealt with. Over."
Credits for what? Nothing has been dealt with yet. It's not over yet, even though we would all want it to be.

"And if GOD can be a little bit more respectful then he used to be, I would be very happy if he came back. Come on GOD, you can do it."
I have to agree on this. As Caduceus said, it's not about what is said but how it is said. You (GOD) did went too far sometimes.

"Caduceus has done way more for the psychonaut community then anybody out there."
This sentence shows you're not being objective.

 

[mysticwarrior]

Come on Psychoid. Give Caduceus a break.

I know he feels bad about this situation. You know that. What do you want to hear? Must Caduceus write another long story? Another discussion?

Caduceus has done way more for the psychonaut community then anybody out there. He made a mistake. Give him some credits. It's dealt with. Over.

And if GOD can be a little bit more respectful then he used to be, I would be very happy if he came back. Come on GOD, you can do it.

And this is very neutral, and a normal thing to do. I would love to see both agree

 

[Caduceus Mercurius]

Yes, not could. I should have handled it differently.

 

[mysticwarrior]

Psychoid, you only want to see a ban, do you? Today i read for the first time this whole thread, and you where clearly visible, trying to make it CM as heat as possible. Please, you to. Stop your inquisition.

 

[Psychoid]

Yes, not could. I should have handled it differently.

That's all?

 

[Psychoid]

I don't want a ban. I want things to be clarified and explained. And I want serious apologies.

 

[mysticwarrior]

Enough is enough, that's not easy to see, does it?

 

[Psychoid]

Mystic, have you seen things you shouldn't normally have?

 

[Caduceus Mercurius]

Sorry Forkbender. It must have been really weird for you, trying to log into that account and not getting in. It must have been a source of stress for you, not just that particular day but all the way up to the present. You must have felt deeply disappointed about me. And so must others have, like restin, and Oleg of course. I shouldn't have done all this.

 

[Psychoid]

Psychoid, you only want to see a ban, do you? Today i read for the first time this whole thread, and you where clearly visible, trying to make it CM as heat as possible. Please, you to. Stop your inquisition.

I just read all of my posts and I don't see how you came to that conclusion. I never tried to bring heat, I only asked for explanations and clarification, and got upset because Caduceus kept evading me. I also don't know why you say I only want to see a ban, as I mentionned a ban only once:

"I am also surprised that you can Hijack a forum and not be banned from it... makes no sense in my opinion?"

It's no inquisition, it's seeking the truth. It may not be important, relevant or desirable for you, but it is for me.

 

[GOD]

Jewses fucking christ you fuckers are crass . You dont see anything but yourselves and you dont read what i or anyone else says or think about anything thats been happening . All you do is stick your heads in the sand and try to pretend you havent seen anything , run away from any comunal responsibility and think you can use me as a scape goat and solve problems by doing that . I tried over and over to solve caduceuses problems and those of heartcore by talking about them . I tried to ignore their attacks . I tried to walk away , I even tried the therapy session that Fork sugested that caduceus and me have . caduceus insisted that i start and that i answer him first. I did that and then he then declaired universal love and peace and ran off to bed . He didnt talk to me , explain his actions or answer what i wanted to know . I then wrote a post reminding him that it was his turn to be honest and answer me....... and his reaction was that he then hijacked the forum , "banned" me , took Restins moderatorship away for no reason , wich Restin still hasnt been given back , and locked Fork out of the administrator acount . What the fucking hell do you sick fuckers want more from me ? When are you going to start looking at things neutraly and honestly . Strangely enough the few here that arent being neutral are ones that are either caduceuses friends and / or people who have had arguments with me on the forum . Nothing i did worked because caduceus didnt want anything else but to be king and to have the last word . He wont answwer questions and twists and dodges to avoid takeing any responsibility for what he say and does . He thinks that the fucking sun shines out of his fucking arse .


Shane be ashamed of yourself . One minute you say you regret what has happened and your part in it and the next you start talking this kiss and make up shit .


Max you are intelligent but compaired to me your a shoe size . You know very well that what you have just said was pointless and that the only effect would be that the people who are less intelligent than you would not see that and think that what you said has substance . You were playing to the balkony and putting on a dumb show to try and fool them .


Mycophile . How do you know what you say ? Why are you so sure of it ? For fucks sake i know so dont come stupid with me now. Why dont you explain it to the others . And to say that caduceus has no power when he lunches with leospace and the others is realy fucking stupid . caduceus has often verbaly chewed leospaces ears off complaining about me and asking for me to be banned and you know that . You also know it because i have said that i was told by the site royalty that that was the way it was . That the problems that i have had with them is because they are fed up with him and heartcore complaining about me and asking for me to be banned . I can prove that because i have it in writeing and could post a screen shot of it......but i wont unless i have permission from the person that sent me that mail .

"Something to do with lunch."

Exactly . Why dont you explain that to the members. I already know that . Its because you are a friend of caduceus and you were often sitting at that table .


"Come on Psychoid. Give Caduceus a break. "

What the fuck . Stop being one sided . You sound like one of the perverts that want roman polansky to be forgiven for drugging a little girl and then fucking her in the arse because they like his films . Have you no self respect ?


Space . I think i have answered all your questions above exept the one about what problems . The problems i am talking about are the ones that you have talked about on the forum and the ones you have talked about to me in PMs . I dont want to talk about that here as i respect the trust that you gave me when you PMd me but if you PM me i will .


caduceus . Who the fuck do you think i asked if i was allowed to write a goodby post ? Who could give me permission to write one ? They didnt know what i would say and put conditions on me and said they would censor it if i talked about you , said anything that you didnt like or talked about the real reasons why you "banned" me . I didnt do any of those things untill you used my goodbye , wich was going to be my last post , to continue playing games , twisting things and breakling the conditions that you had been asked to fullfill . You have done that over and over since you were asked to respect those conditions . Plus you and your lobby have used the last few weeks since you falsly "banned" me to use every opertunity to slander me , tell lies about me and what has happened and why and to throw red herrings in every direction . Because of that i decided fuck the conditions forced on me and the threats made against me and that i would reply to your propoganda campaign , and that of aya , in this thread .

And you useing Doug and bringing him into this is below the belt line and typical for you . Unlike you and heartcore Doug was always prepared to talk with me honestly about any of the times when there was friction between us and we solved every issue in a civilised way . Just as i wont acept anyone slandering my daughter i wont acept you pulling one of the people i respect most into your web of lies and useing him . Dont use him in your vendeta against me unless you ask him first .

The post i posted as Daniel about caduceuses karma, wich was one of my dealer nicknames and what a lot of people still think is my real name , had no asumptions in it . It only contained things that were true .

"Yes, I crossed the line. And I understand nobody agrees with me. I will no longer defend my action. I apologize. I apologize to all members whom I've wronged. I feel embarrassed about it. It was silly. Maybe I could have handled it differently. It felt like the right thing to do, but I guess it's also true I didn't do it the right way. Sorry."

For fucks sake that is total shit . The "Maybe I could have handled it differently bit PROVES that you still havent acepted your dishonesty and still dont realy mean your sorry . If you were you would insist that the "ban" that you put on me be anuled and forgoten and that i get my moderatorship back . And also that Restin and Fork get the same . To show you are sorry has nothing to do with WORTHLESS apologys . To show you are sorry and have learned from your mistakes and wont do it again you would have to make sure that those things were put right .

You also said that heartcore left his job as administrator because of me . Explain that fully . heartcore told me he left that job because the owner wouldnt pay him enough and because he wouldnt pay his traveling expenses .

Another thing is ...what about the thread that i opened saying happy holidays caduceus and come back so that you could come back without anyone knowing about the reasons you left = because i showed in the moderator section that you had lied and had a vendeta against me . Then think about this......i had arguments with two people , one a moderator , because they posted things in that thread that could look bad for you and got one of them to edit his post so that it wouldnt be embarasing for you . Thats called mutual respect and forgiveness . BUT you have never showed that to me .

What you dumb fucks dont realise is that on the day that caduceus "banned" me my trial ended and i didnt loose . That on that day people realised that there could / might / probably be something to what i had been saying for about a year about the war against me . And on that day the public trial of caduceus , heartcore , mysticwarrior and aya started . In the trial against me they were complainants , witnesses , prosecuters , jurors and judges and they lost . They are also all of those things in their own trials and they have provided the evidence against themselves and there is no way that they can win . There will always be mistrust against them in very many peoples eyes . They dug their own graves , jumped into their own coffins , nailed them up , put them in their own graves and shoveled them full . Then when leospace came back he opened the public trial against himself and reacted in a way that a lot of people question . Now hes in a loose loose situation and there is no way that he can get out of it with no shit sticking to him . The best he can do is limit the damage to him and the forums reputation and credibility by being honest and neutral . And you caduceus got him into that situation .


" it's not about what is said but how it is said."

Bollocks . Its about the way someone chooses to understand it . No one can be expected to ask how anyone will acept words and how he is alowed to talk to them . Its our world and anyone trying to impose their way of talking on others is a child . They should grow up , get some self security and learn to live in a world were there is no imperialism . We arent all fucking robots or clones . Did the last few weeks where i bowed to such idiotic ideas get me anywhere ? Did the situation change ? Did any of you stop being so egoistic and vain ? NO . Stop demanding things from other people like little kids in a nursery or you will have a tantrum and try to be adults

"Caduceus has done way more for the psychonaut community then anybody out there."

That is realy shit . Sounds like vasaline and burning rubber to me . Spice has done much more and so have i . And so has heartcore .

"Psychoid, you only want to see a ban, do you? "

Stop playing games . You are on of caduceuses friends and one of the main acters in the wich hunt against me . Psychoid never said he wants caduceus banned . the only people who have demanded bans are heartcore and caduceus . And you should stop playing mister inocent . Would you object to your threats against me in the moderator thread being posted here ?

Mystic stop being so slimy and playing mister inocent . When did you stop your inquisition against me or do anything to stop caduceuses inquisition against me . You are a real bigot .

 

[Psychoid]

Mystic, have you seen things you shouldn't normally have?

???



Thank you GOD for giving a complete and honest explanation. Let's hope Caduceus can now do the same.


EDIT: Ahuaeynjxs, when did I say I was speaking for the whole community? I'm speaking for myself only. Would you have seen something you shouldn't have?