self-love?

[st.bot.32]

To sopor,

I used to feel very strongly the same way, and still occasionally deal with random bursts of self-negativity, though I'm typically pretty happy these days. For me what helped was analyzing what was triggering those feelings, and where the trigger itself was coming from. Might I ask, for what reasons in particular would you hate and despise yourself (you don't have to answer here if its too personal)? If it is because you think you have failed certain personal expectations, do you hold others to those expectations as well?

Myself, I had a lot of guilt and shame imprinted into me, partially from my fundamentalist upbringing, partially from my own personal reaction to what I was being taught, partially because deep down inside, I just don't fit into what's 'normal' and never will. It takes a long time and a lot of careful self-examination to get over this kind of imprinting... and I'm still learning how to accept, and how to love, every day. This process never really stops, ever, nor would I expect it to.

 

[yuukidyna]

love is just like a bird which can make you fly and it is very great feeling i have not personal experience but i have heard about it.

 

[horalhans]

self love means when we are love to our self not to anybody else, when we are always happy with our self never feel dissapointed, never make to fell neglected and underesstimated to our self and always take life in a positive and in practical way that mean we are love to our self.

 

[VerusDeus]

"Now attend and listen:
The senses meet the object
and from their contact sensation is born.
Thence results recollection.
Thus, as the sun's power through a burning-glass causes fire to appear,
so through the cognizance born of sense and object,
the mind originates and with it the ego, the thought of self,
whom some Brahman teachers call the lord.
The shoot springs from the seed;
the seed is not the shoot,
both are not one and the same,
but successive phases in a continuous growth.
Such is the birth of animated life. [12]

-from the gospels of Buddha

The only way of subdueing the ego, is to rid yourself of desires and dependancies. The only way, i think, of being able to live without ego is to live the life of a monk. No possesion, no home, no money etc. However if you want to do this in our society it may be pretty darn hard :lol: Thus we as psychonauts are bound in a cycle of ego-building and then ego-killing, and then it just grows back again :roll: But you can at least diminish the role of the ego, by selfless conduct, aka being virtuous in it's true sense. But it is just a continuous strife, you can not kill it and be done with for the rest of your life. And in this age of materialism, the emphasis is on individuality, and having an ego seems to be considered a good thing. Making our strife even more arduous.

 

[Bastiaan]

When I downsize my ego I generally dislike others more because I notice their ego more..
It's not really dislike though. I just notice.

 

[magickmumu]

Who is trying to kill who. It's the ego trying to kill itself.

I don't think that the ego is a negative concept. Maybe the ego is sick and need to be healed.
I always look at it as some form of alchemical healing, using the power of mindfulness
Crystallizing and softening the ego and the sense of self hood as time goes by.

 

[bliksem]

If the ego dies, what remains?

 

[magickmumu]

some sort of koan

 

[Jeniger]

infinite love remains :heart:

 

[mysticwarrior]

When I downsize my ego I generally dislike others more because I notice their ego more..
It's not really dislike though. I just notice.

That's exactly what i think. The ego is far to important to be negative about. To many fight it, as if it is there enemy. But for me the ego is just as important as everything else. But you have to be aware of it, so you can drive the car savely home.

If you destroy you ego, then you get indeed thoughts like bastiaan described here above Therefore detaching yourself from the ego, so you can't be blinded by it, and can appreciate the help it serves in our lifes Love your self as whole

 

[bliksem]

Nice!

 

[ophiuchus]

"If the ego dies, what remains?"

the ego cannot ever die. you all still have egos, and so do i, as much as we dont want to admit.. you ever notice after your trips, you can integrate things that you saw during a trip? the whole always remains though, there is always a core, a base to which you add and subtract things. you cannot change all things, not all at once. you cannot be someone else. you can change ALOT, dont get me wrong, you can change the majority of your entire lifestyle for the better, but this is a process of time, and things with time are forgotten, and relearned, and more things come into awareness, more things to keep track of (with a one track only mind) you can never see it all at once. you can come close with psychedelics. some negativity you might put out isn't even visible to the awareness sometimes, even if so a second after.

so it becomes paramount that you keep your mind on an even balance (so as to percieve the negative AND the positive) and react accordingly. if you claim to meditate at all this becomes easier with practice and time, eventually to the point where most negative things look trivial. helps your focus stay on things that matter. the same as you should not thinks twice about accidentally stepping on someones toe, dont get caught up with petty rewards and prizes, both will distract a focused mind. accept and be grateful, but remember, navigating a room full of light is just as impossible as a room with no light.

the idea here is not to lose hope and say fuck it, i cant change. but to remember and make habit(through repetition) that your physical reactions are directly dependent on the things you think.

so to tie this back in to the main topic here, if you start to see (any of 5 senses really) the things around you negatively, it perpetuates the cycle that "life is shit", "i cant do anything right", etc. when in reality NOTHING is "right" or "wrong" only debatable from one side or another. meaning you could have been laughing about the situation and how absurd it was the entire time, and getting an ab workout in the process

of course everything becomes clearer in hindsight, just try to keep that in mind, and simply become the change that you wish to see.

it will take time, good luck

 

[BrainEater]

"Now attend and listen:
The senses meet the object
and from their contact sensation is born.
Thence results recollection.
Thus, as the sun's power through a burning-glass causes fire to appear,
so through the cognizance born of sense and object,
the mind originates and with it the ego, the thought of self,
whom some Brahman teachers call the lord.
The shoot springs from the seed;
the seed is not the shoot,
both are not one and the same,
but successive phases in a continuous growth.
Such is the birth of animated life. [12]

-from the gospels of Buddha

The only way of subdueing the ego, is to rid yourself of desires and dependancies. The only way, i think, of being able to live without ego is to live the life of a monk. No possesion, no home, no money etc. However if you want to do this in our society it may be pretty darn hard :lol: Thus we as psychonauts are bound in a cycle of ego-building and then ego-killing, and then it just grows back again :roll: But you can at least diminish the role of the ego, by selfless conduct, aka being virtuous in it's true sense. But it is just a continuous strife, you can not kill it and be done with for the rest of your life. And in this age of materialism, the emphasis is on individuality, and having an ego seems to be considered a good thing. Making our strife even more arduous.

yeah but maybe we can just live with the material world and be grateful for what we have and don't think of ourselves as better or lesser just because we have more than others. i think what matters is that if some people have a lot more than they need they just have to give it to others who really need it and then we can live peacefully as brothers and sisters, but as long as the ego-game is being played and selfishness rules then the gratitude for the material world etc etc is just a reflection of our self-love and how we share it. we need to love ourselves more and others too so we can grow and evolve as a species AND as individuals. the self-hate because of our being-born-into-heritage only limits us, but also reveals collective patterns as collective patterns reveal individual patterns, we need to see light as an ally and not be scared of it! the sun loves us, it gives us life everyday just like the earth and if we are grateful for that we enter a state of graze, which has been abandoned by many of us, which is the state of pure love and full awareness or something like that....