So I watched the void.
I have to say, firstly, that nothing I say actually conveys how I feel about the movie because my vocabulary does not have the words.
The resonance it had with my hardest trips was almost unbearable. . I almost turned it off. I couldn't imagine why anyone would recommend this movie, and more so on psychedelics - but that is why I kept watching. If no one had recommended it I would have shut it off.
You learn everything. You see everything. You are engulfed by the abyss and you can do nothing. You watch as all you love breaks apart. All you know gets torn, diseased, defiled, broken. There is no reason to live anymore. There is no goals, no end. You'll remember this pain when you die. When you die - this pain is what will be there. When you die, this is what will greet you and you will be with it forever. Cycling through remorse, grief, suffering, anger, contempt. Slowly it stops. The pain gets weaker. The suffering gets muffled. Death gets hidden, and you become blinded to empathy. The churning begins to ease, your body becomes tired, limp, lethargic. You give in to living, you allow it. You just can't take it anymore and stop. You rest.
Then something happens. Everything you experienced is forgotten, but the feelings and emotions linger. You cannot remember what was so bad, but you know it was. You get left with this feeling of something horribly wrong but amnesia to the fact. Amnesia to why you're so angry, why nothing matters.
And so, you're born again. . . A new slate.
It couldn't have mirrored my feelings more exactly.
But that's just me.
Honestly feel like I just came down from an epic spiritual journey. This in combination with my "sober" trip post have really put me somewhere else. Like I said, no words can explain this.