Life is sweet.

[Crimzen]

Life is a beautiful thing.
No matter where your head is at if you can maintain a sense of self and realize that I am I then no harm can truly come to you other than the physical.
Tonight i've learnt that in my particular situation i'm not alone and this means the world to me.
I've seen that regardless of the situation as long as i trust in my inner self and my instincts then i can see this all though.

Just needed an outlet, if you read this then thank you.
I dont feel alone and neither should you, because no matter where your head is at, there is someone out there on the same frequency as you, seriously.

Peace and love my people.

 

[IJesusChrist]

Funny you post this.

Last night I wasn't feeling mentally stable. I knew something was building, and it wasn't going to be euphoric.

On a long drive home I started a conversation with myself -

I was relating, and trying to find a link between the greatest high, the greatest euphoria and the deepest low, the ultimate 'alone'.

I think I may have found it, or at least to my own satisfaction.

I was driving and I began to think about my building anxiety, and I wanted to dive head first in, swim to the bottom of the acid in the pit of my stomach and yank out whatever it was that was making my mood so uneven. I began to recount all the things I had recently thought about that made me sad or uncomfortable and I eventually came to alone-ness. A truly, ultimate, desolate alone. As if dropped from reality, with no chance to ever see color, light, anything again - a true abyss. I realized that this was, in fact, tied to the greatest euphoria, in a very odd way.

When I feel good, when I feel high, I get this feeling (we get this feeling) that we are all together. We are all friends, all loving, all one. We are all one. As if the universe is one entity, and we are just the cells which thrive within, creating a bountiful pool of life, atleast on our planet. At the same time, this "we are all one" wraps us in a box. It places us as one entity - with no brothers, no sisters. The universe is ultimately alone. As we gain our great bliss in our connection to one another, an underlying seperation from anything else comes about.

Whether this has any bearing on anything is not important - but this is how my mind sees in grandeur while depressed. Yet the same topic, the same idea, can be of complete bliss. How can this be?! Duality truly is all encompassing, from the highest to the lowest points, they are all equivalent.

It was an interesting car ride to say the least.

 

[Crimzen]

wat da fuck is with doctor phils face?
dude looks like he just came upon a revelation while trippin lol

IJC thats cool man, i know just what you mean.
The interconnectedness of it all and the oneness can be experienced as both a feeling of never being alone and also as always being alone. Like most things its all a matter of perception i guess.

Lately (for the past few months and even to a further extent since the end of last year) i've felt a whole lot of lonesomeness
I dont want to go into exact details for personal reasons but basically it came about due to changes in social dynamics with the group i usually hang with along with a few other issues (including the bastard of depression i got myself into last year)
Last night i discovered theres someone else who was part of this group that feels EXACTLY how i feel which is very liberating in a way because i really thought i was the only one feeling this.

So today, emotionally, i feel great
unfortunately im also somewhat hungover uke: :retard: :wasted:

 

[Crimzen]

yes i THINK i get what you're getting at
however i havnt had a trip in about a year

 

[Crimzen]

aaand life is getting even sweeter
got a good job prospect in the very near future, i hate being unemployed, well actually i just hate not being able to do anything due to lack of money

PLEASE universe let this work out

 

[IJesusChrist]

JUST HELPIN OUT PSYCHONAUT....