Fear , Ego , Dishonesty , Vanity
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Forkbender
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I try not to take myself too seriously, but it is hard sometimes because I am always right.
I think and honestly believe that drugs do make people realize their Ego. Drugs will always change you. I think consciousness of the Ego is a blessing and a grudge - that's why some people abuse drugs - to lose it again. Yes, I was and am confronted with this things, indeed.
Interesting question. It makes me wonder, I like to pay quite some attention to how I look at times, however I feel this is not vanity but rather as a way to be mindful about how I stand in the world and present myself to other people. Is that just a way for me to hide vanity while actually it is just that?
I never experienced anytjhing related to this subject while tripping so that doesn't tell me anything.
I never experienced anytjhing related to this subject while tripping so that doesn't tell me anything.
To overcome all of these issues permanently, is, I think, impossible for a member of homo sapiens in this present stage of our evolutionary journey.
They are all functiuons of the ego, I say, and the ego must be continually dissolved in order for one to be put in touch with the 'wizard behind the curtain', so to speak.....I think the majority of people find that a psychedelic obliteration of the ego, like we talk about a lot here, is uncomfortable and for many, not always something that can fit in with their lifestyle and schedule.
This is why I, personally, like cannabis. It weakens the ego a bit, but it doesn't send you out to the far edges of the universe.
They are all functiuons of the ego, I say, and the ego must be continually dissolved in order for one to be put in touch with the 'wizard behind the curtain', so to speak.....I think the majority of people find that a psychedelic obliteration of the ego, like we talk about a lot here, is uncomfortable and for many, not always something that can fit in with their lifestyle and schedule.
This is why I, personally, like cannabis. It weakens the ego a bit, but it doesn't send you out to the far edges of the universe.
Caduceus Mercurius
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None of my episodes of panic or discomfort had to do with psychological issues, like vanity, pride, dishonesty and all the others things you project on me. Both my bad trip on LSD/Datura, and my rougher times on shrooms and DMT had to do with the weirdness of the experience, and/or with not being able to figure out what the hell was going on. In the past I've had many head trips on cannabis however, during which I felt bad about my behavior towards my environment (shoplifting etc.), and made radical changes. And if I remember well, the first one or two LSD experiences put my personality on a very different track as well.
Brugmansia
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Fear, Ego, Dishonesty, Vanity is a result of not being in able to let ourselve fall and admit softness as the most pleasant and true ground to stand on during our life time. There is no doubt that being soft enhances all senses in every positive way. The nowadays world is just harsh, and life is drinked with numbed antenna's by many who have no idea.
Fear = Fearing the stronger, harder and numbed aspects/beings of life. Which can result in pain.
Ego = A state in order to envelop autonomous sensory. If displayed, feeling vulnerable and ashamed may be the outcome. For what? The reflecting system decreases self-value otherwise.
Dishonesty = Acting in order to manipulate and claim certain profits by the individual while he knows that he in fact should abstain from what he wants. First solving his integrity instead of proceeding with greed.
Vanity = Believing that one is more worth and gifted and therefore, feels he has the right to control others and make up phrases as good and bad, projecting it on many as a target to achieve.
There is no seperation between body and mind, everything goes through the body from tone to head in fact.
I have by the way closed this world, but no one will really notice. Neither I really worry, since it's simply not believed. Took me a lot of aliened trips, integrations and phases of being lost. But not really because of myself, but more like because I couldn't give my delicacy a place in the only world I knew till then. Later on, when I found out that entire cultures lived life the way I wanted, I could push myself through.
Now I'm here, and do not doubt, that this is the proper natural way to live.
Alcohol, nicotine and cocaine is our world. But the ancient times were cannabis, mescaline and psilo. Somehow we closed this sensivity and choosed to numb our bodies and proceed as reflecting minds. Hence Fear, Ego, Dishonesty, Vanity.
Fear = Fearing the stronger, harder and numbed aspects/beings of life. Which can result in pain.
Ego = A state in order to envelop autonomous sensory. If displayed, feeling vulnerable and ashamed may be the outcome. For what? The reflecting system decreases self-value otherwise.
Dishonesty = Acting in order to manipulate and claim certain profits by the individual while he knows that he in fact should abstain from what he wants. First solving his integrity instead of proceeding with greed.
Vanity = Believing that one is more worth and gifted and therefore, feels he has the right to control others and make up phrases as good and bad, projecting it on many as a target to achieve.
There is no seperation between body and mind, everything goes through the body from tone to head in fact.
I have by the way closed this world, but no one will really notice. Neither I really worry, since it's simply not believed. Took me a lot of aliened trips, integrations and phases of being lost. But not really because of myself, but more like because I couldn't give my delicacy a place in the only world I knew till then. Later on, when I found out that entire cultures lived life the way I wanted, I could push myself through.
Now I'm here, and do not doubt, that this is the proper natural way to live.
Alcohol, nicotine and cocaine is our world. But the ancient times were cannabis, mescaline and psilo. Somehow we closed this sensivity and choosed to numb our bodies and proceed as reflecting minds. Hence Fear, Ego, Dishonesty, Vanity.
Caduceus Mercurius
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I know I'm not devoid of vanity, but that's just because I'm so goddamn handsome that it surprises me every time I look in a mirror. I guess physical beauty just comes with being a demigod.
GOD
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I used to get aprehension before and just after takeing a trip . It started to bother me and i spent a lot of time thinking about it and what i could do . After a while it got to be near to fear and a panic attack without haveing the fight or flight reaction that Mr.Smith mentioned . Meditation didnt help me much as i was full of the thought that it was me haveing negative thoughts and that maybe i was mentaly weak , had psychelogic problems , was a coward and that in the end it was me doing negative things to me . That i was the problem and i was punishing myself .
After a while i realised that it realy was me that was the "problem" , that it was me getting woried and me makeing myself woried . Then i realised that it was my ego . That it was shitting out and getting woried about giving up control . Then i thought its a part of me , a part i need to survive and that its not trying to hurt me its realy trying to protect me . So i acepted it , acepted that it was a part of me and made friends with it , learned to love it .
Then when i took a trip i started doing it ritualy and not just being a psychedelic tourist throwing things into my head without realy doing it consciously . Part of the ritual was that just before i took the drug i meditated and talked to my body and consciousnes ,. Saying "Fear and anger , i acept you , you are an important part of me and i couldnt survive without you . But now i`m going to do something and i`m going to put you down for a few hours but after that i will take you up again " . Then i concentrated on my baseball bat and projected my fear and anger into it knowing that if i needed it it was nearby and i was protected . ( Why do yiou think shamen have ritual objects , power objects , things like a ritual daggar ? I`m not saying i think i`m a shaman ) . This worked for me .
After a while i realised that it realy was me that was the "problem" , that it was me getting woried and me makeing myself woried . Then i realised that it was my ego . That it was shitting out and getting woried about giving up control . Then i thought its a part of me , a part i need to survive and that its not trying to hurt me its realy trying to protect me . So i acepted it , acepted that it was a part of me and made friends with it , learned to love it .
Then when i took a trip i started doing it ritualy and not just being a psychedelic tourist throwing things into my head without realy doing it consciously . Part of the ritual was that just before i took the drug i meditated and talked to my body and consciousnes ,. Saying "Fear and anger , i acept you , you are an important part of me and i couldnt survive without you . But now i`m going to do something and i`m going to put you down for a few hours but after that i will take you up again " . Then i concentrated on my baseball bat and projected my fear and anger into it knowing that if i needed it it was nearby and i was protected . ( Why do yiou think shamen have ritual objects , power objects , things like a ritual daggar ? I`m not saying i think i`m a shaman ) . This worked for me .
GOD
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Ego , ego death .
I didnt write this in the "Ego loss" thread so i`ll put it here . If you can remember , or find that thread you can read what Caduceus and Spice said in the first few pages . Both were right . This is one of my explenations .
When your born your as near to being a clean slate as you will ever be . The experiences right from the start come very fast . Everything is new and one finds a strategy to deal with what happens . That means for every experience you find an answer that enables you to deal with it / live with it / yourself . These answers become your ego , your public you , the way you see yourself and act . Each answer is like a piece of armour protecting your inner self , the most woundable and delicate part of you . Just like links in a chain mail suit of armour . Some of those answeres are right , some wrong , some good and some bad . When you take a good dose of psychedelics you peal off those shields and get back to being the inner you . They come off piece by piece and some of them hurt . When you are on the trip you can rethink some of those answers and while you come down and become your every day you again you can put those pieces of armour on in a better order , fitted together better and even replace the not so good ones / answers with better ones . Thats why and how psychedelic therapys work .
"you raise the blade, you make the change
you rearrange me ' till I'm sane"
I didnt write this in the "Ego loss" thread so i`ll put it here . If you can remember , or find that thread you can read what Caduceus and Spice said in the first few pages . Both were right . This is one of my explenations .
When your born your as near to being a clean slate as you will ever be . The experiences right from the start come very fast . Everything is new and one finds a strategy to deal with what happens . That means for every experience you find an answer that enables you to deal with it / live with it / yourself . These answers become your ego , your public you , the way you see yourself and act . Each answer is like a piece of armour protecting your inner self , the most woundable and delicate part of you . Just like links in a chain mail suit of armour . Some of those answeres are right , some wrong , some good and some bad . When you take a good dose of psychedelics you peal off those shields and get back to being the inner you . They come off piece by piece and some of them hurt . When you are on the trip you can rethink some of those answers and while you come down and become your every day you again you can put those pieces of armour on in a better order , fitted together better and even replace the not so good ones / answers with better ones . Thats why and how psychedelic therapys work .
"you raise the blade, you make the change
you rearrange me ' till I'm sane"
IJesusChrist
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I don't have problems. People have problems. People are stupid and I know I'm smart, GOD you are dumb and I am smart.
:roll:
I kid, but I usually don't know how to combat my fear. My dishonesty is minimal except with my father, whom I rarely share any information with - I'm getting better though with that.
I don't really know if I've ever had ego death. I've felt it sober, I believe... It also usually isn't accompanied by bliss or euphoria but an intense feeling of "everything is nothing"... I havn't felt it for some time and I don't want to.
Edit: GOD I just read your last post. I think I felt that on ayahuasca. I was with friends, and I was the only one tripping. I felt like I just wanted to talk, and tell them I really liked who they were. Actually, no this was not ego death. This was just love :wink:
:roll:
I kid, but I usually don't know how to combat my fear. My dishonesty is minimal except with my father, whom I rarely share any information with - I'm getting better though with that.
I don't really know if I've ever had ego death. I've felt it sober, I believe... It also usually isn't accompanied by bliss or euphoria but an intense feeling of "everything is nothing"... I havn't felt it for some time and I don't want to.
Edit: GOD I just read your last post. I think I felt that on ayahuasca. I was with friends, and I was the only one tripping. I felt like I just wanted to talk, and tell them I really liked who they were. Actually, no this was not ego death. This was just love :wink:
GOD
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Dishonesty .
There are 2 sorts of disshonesty . The one where you steal things , lie and cheat and the other where you are emotionaly disshonest . The first doesnt pay and is usualy a phase . The second is very damageing and dangerous . In the end they make a person untrustable often to the point where they cant even trust themselves . Takeing psychedelics one gets the chance to see both sorts in onself and in others . Thats often why people think others are playing games with them . They can see that the person is hideing and / or pretending to be something they are not or that they are doing it themselves . A free , honest spirit shines to other free honest spirits . People who are disshonest with themselves often project their disshonesty on those free , honest spirits , dont see their honesty and get frightened of them . Playing tourist games with psychedelics works for different people for different lengths of time but sometime we get confronted with our real selves or the consequencies of our dishonesty . One cant deny it and think that one can get away with it but one cant . Some people deny their disshonesty / games and some try run away from them but one cant run away from oneself = one gets BIG problems .
So unless your prepared to get to know yourself and deal honestly with it DONT TAKE PSYCHEDELICS .
There are 2 sorts of disshonesty . The one where you steal things , lie and cheat and the other where you are emotionaly disshonest . The first doesnt pay and is usualy a phase . The second is very damageing and dangerous . In the end they make a person untrustable often to the point where they cant even trust themselves . Takeing psychedelics one gets the chance to see both sorts in onself and in others . Thats often why people think others are playing games with them . They can see that the person is hideing and / or pretending to be something they are not or that they are doing it themselves . A free , honest spirit shines to other free honest spirits . People who are disshonest with themselves often project their disshonesty on those free , honest spirits , dont see their honesty and get frightened of them . Playing tourist games with psychedelics works for different people for different lengths of time but sometime we get confronted with our real selves or the consequencies of our dishonesty . One cant deny it and think that one can get away with it but one cant . Some people deny their disshonesty / games and some try run away from them but one cant run away from oneself = one gets BIG problems .
So unless your prepared to get to know yourself and deal honestly with it DONT TAKE PSYCHEDELICS .
GOD, your last posts have been truly interesting.
Some questions :
1/ You say that "one shouldn't take psychedelics if one is not prepared to get to know oneself and deal honestly with it". That sounds wise and true to me. However, how can you know that you know yourself ?
2/ Does your statement above implies that you can take psychedelics if you don't know yourself ?
Some questions :
1/ You say that "one shouldn't take psychedelics if one is not prepared to get to know oneself and deal honestly with it". That sounds wise and true to me. However, how can you know that you know yourself ?
2/ Does your statement above implies that you can take psychedelics if you don't know yourself ?
GOD
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" how can you know that you know yourself ? "
You cant , you can only do your best . Knowing that and knowing that you are doing your best is all you can do . Doing it is a release and a shield against harm .
Anyone can take psychedelics but if one does it a lot eventualy one will be shown reflections of oneself in ones own mirror . As i said one cant run away from oneself .
You cant , you can only do your best . Knowing that and knowing that you are doing your best is all you can do . Doing it is a release and a shield against harm .
Anyone can take psychedelics but if one does it a lot eventualy one will be shown reflections of oneself in ones own mirror . As i said one cant run away from oneself .
