Epic cock block

[mrvitorsky]

I just had to post this, others tell me about your epic cock blocks. Well, Im off work sitting in my friendly bar(abbey) and Im next to this fucking gorgeous blonde. She just starts feeling me up and then wants me to hold her hand, well this girl shes with freaks out at me and starts going get your fucking hands off her. Im just looking at her and i go weeelllll she started feeling me up i responded, stop freaking out at me, she continues too, so thru out the night the girl next to me is feeling me up and there is nothing i can do about it, and i say that and that her friend wants to kill me i want to touch you but i cant, and her friend gets a bitchy voice and goes, what makes you think that and i go well remember 10 mins ago, and they leave and the girl that was feeling me up says damn and shakes her head and leaves with her.... that lesbo bitch totally cock blocked me... goooooood I got blue balls... FUCK!

 

[Crimzen]

LooooL
dam man, thats messed up

 

[mysticwarrior]

suspicious! 8)

 

[Bastiaan]

Well.. why didn't you just tell your blonde admirer to tell the cock block lesbian to step off? Are you sure they weren't laming around together (with would be incredibly lame)? Or you could have smiled at her and said: "I understand you want a piece of me as well honey, I'll consider it but you'll have to do better then this if you want in.. don't be insecure.. you're pretty cute!" or something.. ^^
Don't drink too much man, if you wouldn't have you would have come up with something like this for sure

 

[IJesusChrist]

Haha

Here's one while I was at a frat.

I see this semi-pretty girl, very wasted (I'm pretty sure she was just acting wasted) comes up and says "can you get me a beer?"

"Ah, sorry I don't live here"
"Pleaseeeeeeeeeee?"
"Really I don't even know where the fridge is"
"I do, come on!"
We go upstairs into this room packed with a buncha frat bros and some hot chicky girlfriends, and sure enough there is the fridge, behind 3 or 4 200 lb presumably football playing frat bros.

"Yeah see... they uh, yeah I don't think I can get you one." (Completely oblivious at the time that I could totally get laid)

"Fine. God. Take a body shot with me then."
this point I'm like fuck yeah!! But instead of her going down, and taking her shirt off or whatever, she pushes ME down. The salt on my belly, the lime in my mouth and the shot on my chest. She does it, and when she goes for the lime its a pretty long suck. Its like a minute makeout in the middle of a packed room. She then grabs my shirt and pulls me up. And I start following her, my roomate says something to me, I turn around, say something back, and then go out the door. The girl walks into another room with another guy. Game over

 

[mrvitorsky]

Ya it was her friend, they knew each other, I think they might of been in some sort of relationship. But that blonde girl was all over me for some reason, whatever just tourist ill never see them again(im in New Orleans). I just didnt want the situation to escalate so i just shut my mouth, I mean I cant hit a women in the face if she attacks me. Either way i got my satisfaction last night, not a cock blocking friend this time, this time her friend introduced me to her and made a point to leave the bar, and even said, if you guys need a place you can come by my apartment. Took her to my place but i was to drunk to fuck so we just, necked, i fingered her till she moaned, went to sleep and went at it in the morning again and I got her a cab, a tourist so ill never see her again, and i think she had a boyfriend(or it coulda been husband)... tourist, they're good for 2 things tips(delivery boy) and one night stands, hell tourist come to new orleans for one night stands.

 

[cockknocker]

I bet when you got epically cock blocked you got so mad and wanted to give a random guy an epic cock knock.

 

[greenwizard]

haha, now that would be epic!

 

[restin]

I don't understand anything lol

 

[mrvitorsky]

well cockknocker i am bi....

 

[????????]

^do you think people are naturally bi but get socially conditioned to only express their sexuality towards a particular sex?

 

[mrvitorsky]

I just accept the fact that I don't know how it works or why I like men and every now and then I see a man I would love to be with.

 

[????????]

yeah you follow your desires instinctively. i think some people repress their wants because of social conditioning and self-imposed labels

 

[cockknocker]

well cockknocker i am bi....

I meant a punch in the balls ->

 

[Crimzen]

I fuckin love jay n silent bob

dying to get a bluntman and chronic comic 2

 

[Arcticpheonix]

^do you think people are naturally bi but get socially conditioned to only express their sexuality towards a particular sex?

Yup, 100%. I've never been able to figure out why everybody is so uptight about homosexuality. So the bible makes some passing reference. Who CARES!