Warning: I make a case out of what I've come to understand. I've lived my life as a test, and I never realised it until know. I sit on information that could make you high by talking about it. It sounds wicked right? So of you laugh now and think Im stupid, don't read more, cause it gets worse, alot worse 
. This is my life curse: 
Also, this is only my thoughts and my perspective and my truth. Please don't attack my thoughts, actions or view on life. Accept me as I accept you.
I've just spent a day in the madness of doing alot of N2O and some cannabis. The background to this is that I've under LSD, N20 and cannabis came to some very cool solutions and in my ordinary life - where I don't use drugs (people don't know I do drugs, not all of the people I know) - I've done all that I can to find the TRUTH to life. And this is throu information such as understanding string theory, relativity, quantum mechanics, law of attraction, parts of law of one, alot of conspiracy stories, alot of mediums and etc, alot of reasearch on the afterlife, and everything that I've read have I and continue to question it to see it objective.
So, I've lived in life as a stoner during my own time and as a stoner Im a late night worker that's been tryin' to figure out what life is and why I am here, why am I aware? At first I started to realise throu the programmin' that I've done myself (such as php), that our body and brain seems alot like something that could be coded.
I started smokin' cannabis when I was 18 and did study it for 5 years while intoxicating myself maybe 1-4times per month. I was really afraid of all propaganda against it... And this time proved for me to be proof of how objective I am, cause I lay awake sometimes thinkin' on if its really ok to be smokin' and to be high. And my conclusion is that as long as it is something positive and that I gain intellect and don't fuck up my life, I can be as high as I want! And Im sittin' on alot of information that easily could make me rich (and will), but only for a small time during the time we all start to wake up to the truth! Which we will do
After I had studied cannabis and its history I started to unveil alot of secrets that was kept from us ordinary people. I learned about 9/11 for example, and I learned that all that I know could be a lie - and that was for me an epiphany, amonst several more to come. And I've based everything that I know on information from a view where I've questioned everything - is it true? is it false?
I've almost gone "wacko" sometimes (ego death), and this after I read a book that afterlife does exist - so I thought; What do I have to fear? Nothing? I am fearless, I mean, sooner or later I'll live in a beatuiful world that is so amazing you can't even believe it. But until then, I might aswell go crazy - what do I have to loose? If my life is only in my brain and if I die when I die, then whops, but if not; What do I have to loose to really find the meaning of life?
And to find the meaning of life you must find information that can tell you what life is. And its important that you understand that everything is what you believe it is.
To my experience from today, and I can still feel that I've been energized, I should be tired but have instead a little migraine, and that could be because of my epiphany. But I don't know, I seem to get migraine when I have life-transforming epiphanys and have during the latest weeks been reading alot about 2012..
So, to my day, there are 2 aspects too what I've witnessed on N2O and Cannabis.
First, I got a wild idea, so wild I can't believe it but yet its so true: We're all just a piece of code. We are matrix and we are a consioussness that is everything. This could be true, and this could only be in my head. The only truth is your truth, and only you can find your truth - this was my truth.
And then when I started to think that way I started to realise I had to convince myself (my brain, the guy who I am behind my avatar on this forum) and the more I looked into information the more I realised that shit, I am right.. I am right, I am just a piece of code and I know EVERYTHING, cause I AM EVERYTHING!
But how can I prove this, I mean, I don't want to get an ephipany that sends my body dead to the floor in "this reality".. But something is happening, we're starting to realise that something big is happpening, and that is that we all are waking up to different consioussness and that we will all be living in peace in a world with only POSITIVITY. We live today in a DUALITY where POSITIVE and NEGATIVE are on the same "level", but in our next evolution we will live on either a positive level or a negative level. I do assume that it all comes down to a choosen consioussness from our part - of who we want to be.
And I do believe its fun to be 'you' - maybe I should say ego? - to be yourself cause then you can form you into what you want to be, and that makes it so some alot of people believe in that we all are separated in mind - and not the same - but we are the same!
I did during the day realise that I was a programmed code of how a drug is working. And I realised that everything is coming togheter into a zero point, and this is probably 2012. I felt that I was myself - the programmer - and that it was all going to change, the code I was was going to go to a zero point and after that it becomes what it want's to be. I felt that this had too do with 2012.
Now that I sit here after this I start to think if I can just escape this reality and just chill, but what I do understand is that I must understand how important it is to know it all. Because with knowing comes alot of responsibilty and the notion that free will is a must. And that my counterpart can only be what is against free will, even if its a small thing.
All that is against free will is a form of negative energy, and vice versa.
The cool and intresting stuff on Nitrous Oxide and Cannabis (hehe, there's more) is that when my friend came here. I told him that I knew everything and that I could prove it. I told him to ask me something, I would be able to answer this, and it would be no problem. He never during the whole day we were togheter asked me a question that could make him believe in what I'm talkin' about.
It was literally a fight between the devil saying: Nothing is connected, and God saying: We're all connected.
While on Nitrous Oxide and Cannabis simultaneously we booth experience telepathy, he said while we where out walking amongst clouds (I remember seeing something rainbow-like) that he needed to take a piss. And at this moment we booth sat quiet and never talked. When he said to me in my head "I need to take a piss" I stood up, cause I thought it was me first that needed to take a piss... I started to come down and realised we never opened our mouths and then I said (in swedish): "Shit, we're all the same! And we just talked about it in our heads! You need to take a piss and you told it to me in our heads right?" He looked a little chocked at me: "Yees".. And then he went to take a leak. (This was the third time total that we've succesfully sent information to eachothers brain, we've done it with colors on two other occastions).
Now I realised that he and I where experiencing whatever we wanted to experience - we we're inside Matrix and that's how we could walk togheter in another world while trippin on n2o. So I came up with the idea that if he got wasted first I could find him in his fantasy when I got wasted.
The coolest part was when I turned into a lizard (The Singer from The Doors was a lizardking in another dimension while on LSD) and I was really a lizard. I felt like one and I moved like one. He turned into one aswell, and as soon as I thought or mentioned that we're all one and that's why we can experience this!!! He turned away and I couldn't contact him, and my conclusion: A possession because of fears. And with possession I mean that it could be whatever your fantasy makes of it. He couldn't on a deep level believe we all really where one, and all proof that I tried to bring to him was discarded.
And this brings me to the ALL is NEGATIVE and POSITIVE, his fears are negative cause fear is a negative feeling. And when he gets afraid that "shit everything is ONE!" he shuns out the truth and the negative grabs a hold on him - and this could be a possession if you believe that EVERYTHING is just a MIND and that this MIND is based on free will at ALL TIMES. Since we could throu telepathy talk with eachother I now also realised that all my thoughts in my head was recieved by him and he then tried to fool me like he really was the devil. But I too felt like the devil, and I must be him since all is one. Just like we all are everything, you are me and I am you, but what we are is Infinte Awareness that experience life from a viewpoint that everything is separated - and that's the point. How could we otherwise experience our creation?
Our brains are here to stop us from recieveing too much information, without our brains this world wouldn't exist and when you enter a psychosis your mind probably gets trapped "out there" and is lost. There's stories from the afterlife of people working as people rescuing trapped conscioussness..
And the fun thing now, the reason that I even understand this - is that we're fighting a war for our minds. My mind is free, and I don't need drugs to be free.. But since the otherside, the evil side, do everything to fool me into not believin' that we all are one, they poison me with flour and aspartame for example.. And other addictions that are unhealthy to my earthbound body and mind. That's why we got war and famine, cause we're to fooled to understand we don't have to have problems. Problems only exist as long as we choose for them to exist. But you can't cheat your way to enlightment, it comes with responsibility and understanding (information). Or by knowing (meditation).
I found out some days ago that flour could affect your 3rd eye becuase your 3rd eye contains water. It damages this source of water - hence turns of your 3rd eye (had too do with kalcium, but I could be wrong). And then you got a triple 6 in your forhead (when your 3rd eye is off). The symbolism covers what Im saying and its all thanks to all information and experiences that I've had during my time here on planet earth. Even if flour has nothing to do with the 3rd eye, I can easily tell you that Carl Sagan was right when he said that the insights you get when you're stoned - are real insights!
One thing I did while me and my friend was high on n2o was too see how sure I was one the things I said, I said to my friend "we ARE all one" and it was with such confidence I couldn't be wrong. I invited him all the time to disprove me and he couldn't, he was "out there" spacing around tryin' to fight his own fears. Sometimes it seemed entities entered and left his body, and I felt this experience the first time I did n2o on cannabis earlier this year, which was the 2nd time ever. From that experience and my first I realised that n2o makes you become your fantasy, or what you're thinkin' about. So I have experienced being god and being the devil - and even if its my fantasy, it was an ephiphany.
Another intresting story I heard, was that of a guy that from an LSD trip saw and built a circuit board, he also tested it in his trip. When he came back he tried it, sadly the story didn't tell if it worked in "real-life" for him. The fun thing though is that me and my friend discussed this. And after we had been lizards (2times) he started to not be able to be a lizard again. It was like he almost believed that we were one and could do anything! But he wasn't ready and that's because he was afraid. And at a point I knew why, I told him "hey I know why you're afraid, just ask me and I tell you". He never asked me a specific question, and when he did I started to come down and realise that he must solve his own problems before he can see the Matrix. But he learned alot and started to stop thinking of doing drugs just to "have fun" or escape reality, when they sometimes can take you close to it. Its just that, you must understand what you're doing and to be responsible at all times! Still its free will and when you don't violate free will you're all clear. That's why the light side never can die.
I've grown and I've faced my fears, and I've been evolving inside, so I can blossom and come clear on this forum on what I've come to understand - cause there has to be people out there like me I want to know what the plans are to wake "us" up. I mean before I really got this far I've been learning how to overthrow the goverment by their own evil scheme. And when I learned to be fearless but smart/intelligent, I started to understand that "they" - thoose that says we're separate and that manipulate us - never can stop me or give me a good reason for why I would be wrong with my arguments. I don't want to argue what I know, cause its only what I know, and I can't say what I know is the truth. If I say that, its because its my truth. You choose your truth, and that's why I don't argue. You always have your own free will to follow your own beliefs!
I've also faced sometimes that its possible for me while on heavy mind altering drugs such as LSD, to leave this body and be somewhere else. But I've never really stepped out, only onetime on Salvia. Then I was nowhere and in another dimension. I just was, and I was so sure that it was another dimension, and that theese did exist, but back in thoose days I didn't have the information about what I know today. So it was a just a trip but that left me thinkin' bout life and what's behind it. So I wonder what happens to me on salvia if I do it today? Cannabis and N20 are my favorites so far, and LSD I did to test to see if multiple realities really can exist.. I got some weird reactions on that and proof for me that multiple realities do exist. I couldn't tell reality apart from reality and it was a mess, but I knew it was all going to be ok, and it is ok. I came down from LSD booth times I tried it with tears and with vibrations all over my body and a feeling that everything is beatuiful and everything will be ok . I will not try LSD again, just because I don't believe in drugs to escape this reality, this is THE reality I want to be living in . I only smoke cannabis to stay in touch withmyself and to struggle against the pain forced from Babylon onto my mind and body. But I know that one day I won't need to smoke cannabis, and that day could be anyday - but Im a stoner and maybe cannabis is my elixir? Well, its free will, so I guess I create whatever it is for me, time will tell.. A year ago I would've thought I've gone crazy, so I guess there's a reason I write about this in such detail now. I could bring in alot of other things such as Law of Attraction and synchronizity that have helped me see that I do have more power over life than I thought, also that life has control of me. Universe seem to line up things and this only makes it easier for me to understand that we all really are one. Its one thing to say it, and one thing to know it.
I started writing this with migraine, but I've smoked more grass, and I've come to sense with what I've experienced, and my migraine is not as intense. Have I further calmed my brain? Did it "reprogram"? What is migraine really? How come I only get it thinkin' of lifes deep mysteries, and when Im "waking" up to Infinite Awareness? I have stopped with all medecine that's not herbal, so cannabis have really helped me find a way to be myself as the avatar I choose to experience in life.
A very good question my friend asked me, which didn't prove to him that we all are one, was when he asked me: "Ok, what is the best and most coolest drug to take". I said "Your Brain!" and I was away on n2o and I felt so sure that its your brain of course, and all he wanted to do was escape reality, I wanted to understand it. And the brain is the most awesome tool we got, and we can influence it with drugs, it can also create its own drugs. I would like to say that life sort of is an addiction.. Guess it needs more explanation than that, but I'll try to keep it not too long, so I'll skip it.
I would like to come to the conclusion that consioussness is just programmed. And it all strings from information. That's why 2012 is so cool, cause you could be cosmos if you like. But you could also create your own little reality world with your friends, but also we will be one and understand that we all are one. And then we can live in a world that is awesome. So awesome I can't imagine it fully, but I can understand this: When Im peaking on N2O and Cannabis - at that moment Im IT ALL. I am the Consioussness then, but only after how I express it. Cause I am an expression of myself, just like you are.
And we are here to express ourselves and live our lives. I've kinda not lived my life like ordinary people do, cause ordinary people don't contemplate theese things and they don't say its all a coded string.
The trick that the devil pulled was to make you believe he didn't exist. Of course he does, he's the negative, and the expressions of it. And we all mix with our expressions, like fear, hate, anger, sadness, anxiety are negative and happiness, curiousity, love, understanding are positive. We are the mix of all this, and therefore we all are unique and different but still the same at the source.
And theese expressions are what we are. We are just an expression of a way to experience life. And my expression is pretty daamn sneaky I understand know. I'm forced to split personality cause I've been doing work as a stoner disguised as a normal middle class everyday Joe. So I got the best of two words for my expression. I have since a kid always had the feeling that I shouldn't do whatever everyone else do, so I've kinda walked my own yellowbrick road learning from mine and others mistakes. I've also learned from all and been objective about what I keep as truth. And if Im wrong, Im very fast to admit it and change my point of view.
You can't be my expression, cause then you and I would be the same. So what happens is that we wake up to our own expression and that we all are one. I wonder if laziness is negative or positive, I do believe it mixes a little of booth, and that's what we always do. We balance, we are YING and YANG.
That's why we can be everything and still be humans on this planet, in this moment. The moment is just an illusion, and does it matter? Nah I live with my brain 'til I get tired of it.
Peace and love and alot of light !!
NOTE. I did write this on the night after that mad mad day, and I realised I couldn't post until I had read it, so I did it the day after (today). I was awake and energized the whole night, and I feel high today, but know I have more to learn, and I have to continue to fight the system with all plans I have. Also for all of thoose that think Im a lunatic and madman, or that I got a psychosis. I'm fine, no need to worry about me, care about yourself instead and care about your life and your friends and family. Never forget that love is what we all need and by love I mean acceptance and understanding. Respect everyone and their opinions, that's why I don't argue cause I accept your opinion - even if I don't agree.
. This is my life curse: Also, this is only my thoughts and my perspective and my truth. Please don't attack my thoughts, actions or view on life. Accept me as I accept you.
I've just spent a day in the madness of doing alot of N2O and some cannabis. The background to this is that I've under LSD, N20 and cannabis came to some very cool solutions and in my ordinary life - where I don't use drugs (people don't know I do drugs, not all of the people I know) - I've done all that I can to find the TRUTH to life. And this is throu information such as understanding string theory, relativity, quantum mechanics, law of attraction, parts of law of one, alot of conspiracy stories, alot of mediums and etc, alot of reasearch on the afterlife, and everything that I've read have I and continue to question it to see it objective.
So, I've lived in life as a stoner during my own time and as a stoner Im a late night worker that's been tryin' to figure out what life is and why I am here, why am I aware? At first I started to realise throu the programmin' that I've done myself (such as php), that our body and brain seems alot like something that could be coded.
I started smokin' cannabis when I was 18 and did study it for 5 years while intoxicating myself maybe 1-4times per month. I was really afraid of all propaganda against it... And this time proved for me to be proof of how objective I am, cause I lay awake sometimes thinkin' on if its really ok to be smokin' and to be high. And my conclusion is that as long as it is something positive and that I gain intellect and don't fuck up my life, I can be as high as I want!
And Im sittin' on alot of information that easily could make me rich (and will), but only for a small time during the time we all start to wake up to the truth! Which we will do After I had studied cannabis and its history I started to unveil alot of secrets that was kept from us ordinary people. I learned about 9/11 for example, and I learned that all that I know could be a lie - and that was for me an epiphany, amonst several more to come. And I've based everything that I know on information from a view where I've questioned everything - is it true? is it false?
I've almost gone "wacko" sometimes (ego death), and this after I read a book that afterlife does exist - so I thought; What do I have to fear? Nothing? I am fearless, I mean, sooner or later I'll live in a beatuiful world that is so amazing you can't even believe it. But until then, I might aswell go crazy - what do I have to loose? If my life is only in my brain and if I die when I die, then whops, but if not; What do I have to loose to really find the meaning of life?
And to find the meaning of life you must find information that can tell you what life is. And its important that you understand that everything is what you believe it is.
To my experience from today, and I can still feel that I've been energized, I should be tired but have instead a little migraine, and that could be because of my epiphany. But I don't know, I seem to get migraine when I have life-transforming epiphanys and have during the latest weeks been reading alot about 2012..
So, to my day, there are 2 aspects too what I've witnessed on N2O and Cannabis.
First, I got a wild idea, so wild I can't believe it but yet its so true: We're all just a piece of code. We are matrix and we are a consioussness that is everything. This could be true, and this could only be in my head. The only truth is your truth, and only you can find your truth - this was my truth.
And then when I started to think that way I started to realise I had to convince myself (my brain, the guy who I am behind my avatar on this forum) and the more I looked into information the more I realised that shit, I am right.. I am right, I am just a piece of code and I know EVERYTHING, cause I AM EVERYTHING!
But how can I prove this, I mean, I don't want to get an ephipany that sends my body dead to the floor in "this reality".. But something is happening, we're starting to realise that something big is happpening, and that is that we all are waking up to different consioussness and that we will all be living in peace in a world with only POSITIVITY. We live today in a DUALITY where POSITIVE and NEGATIVE are on the same "level", but in our next evolution we will live on either a positive level or a negative level. I do assume that it all comes down to a choosen consioussness from our part - of who we want to be.
And I do believe its fun to be 'you' - maybe I should say ego? - to be yourself cause then you can form you into what you want to be, and that makes it so some alot of people believe in that we all are separated in mind - and not the same - but we are the same!
I did during the day realise that I was a programmed code of how a drug is working. And I realised that everything is coming togheter into a zero point, and this is probably 2012. I felt that I was myself - the programmer - and that it was all going to change, the code I was was going to go to a zero point and after that it becomes what it want's to be. I felt that this had too do with 2012.
Now that I sit here after this I start to think if I can just escape this reality and just chill, but what I do understand is that I must understand how important it is to know it all. Because with knowing comes alot of responsibilty and the notion that free will is a must. And that my counterpart can only be what is against free will, even if its a small thing.
All that is against free will is a form of negative energy, and vice versa.
The cool and intresting stuff on Nitrous Oxide and Cannabis (hehe, there's more) is that when my friend came here. I told him that I knew everything and that I could prove it. I told him to ask me something, I would be able to answer this, and it would be no problem. He never during the whole day we were togheter asked me a question that could make him believe in what I'm talkin' about.
It was literally a fight between the devil saying: Nothing is connected, and God saying: We're all connected.
While on Nitrous Oxide and Cannabis simultaneously we booth experience telepathy, he said while we where out walking amongst clouds (I remember seeing something rainbow-like) that he needed to take a piss. And at this moment we booth sat quiet and never talked. When he said to me in my head "I need to take a piss" I stood up, cause I thought it was me first that needed to take a piss... I started to come down and realised we never opened our mouths and then I said (in swedish): "Shit, we're all the same! And we just talked about it in our heads! You need to take a piss and you told it to me in our heads right?" He looked a little chocked at me: "Yees".. And then he went to take a leak. (This was the third time total that we've succesfully sent information to eachothers brain, we've done it with colors on two other occastions).
Now I realised that he and I where experiencing whatever we wanted to experience - we we're inside Matrix and that's how we could walk togheter in another world while trippin on n2o. So I came up with the idea that if he got wasted first I could find him in his fantasy when I got wasted.
The coolest part was when I turned into a lizard (The Singer from The Doors was a lizardking in another dimension while on LSD) and I was really a lizard. I felt like one and I moved like one. He turned into one aswell, and as soon as I thought or mentioned that we're all one and that's why we can experience this!!! He turned away and I couldn't contact him, and my conclusion: A possession because of fears. And with possession I mean that it could be whatever your fantasy makes of it. He couldn't on a deep level believe we all really where one, and all proof that I tried to bring to him was discarded.
And this brings me to the ALL is NEGATIVE and POSITIVE, his fears are negative cause fear is a negative feeling. And when he gets afraid that "shit everything is ONE!" he shuns out the truth and the negative grabs a hold on him - and this could be a possession if you believe that EVERYTHING is just a MIND and that this MIND is based on free will at ALL TIMES. Since we could throu telepathy talk with eachother I now also realised that all my thoughts in my head was recieved by him and he then tried to fool me like he really was the devil. But I too felt like the devil, and I must be him since all is one
. Just like we all are everything, you are me and I am you, but what we are is Infinte Awareness that experience life from a viewpoint that everything is separated - and that's the point. How could we otherwise experience our creation? Our brains are here to stop us from recieveing too much information, without our brains this world wouldn't exist and when you enter a psychosis your mind probably gets trapped "out there" and is lost. There's stories from the afterlife of people working as people rescuing trapped conscioussness..
And the fun thing now, the reason that I even understand this - is that we're fighting a war for our minds. My mind is free, and I don't need drugs to be free.. But since the otherside, the evil side, do everything to fool me into not believin' that we all are one, they poison me with flour and aspartame for example.. And other addictions that are unhealthy to my earthbound body and mind. That's why we got war and famine, cause we're to fooled to understand we don't have to have problems. Problems only exist as long as we choose for them to exist. But you can't cheat your way to enlightment, it comes with responsibility and understanding (information). Or by knowing (meditation).
I found out some days ago that flour could affect your 3rd eye becuase your 3rd eye contains water. It damages this source of water - hence turns of your 3rd eye (had too do with kalcium, but I could be wrong). And then you got a triple 6 in your forhead (when your 3rd eye is off). The symbolism covers what Im saying and its all thanks to all information and experiences that I've had during my time here on planet earth. Even if flour has nothing to do with the 3rd eye, I can easily tell you that Carl Sagan was right when he said that the insights you get when you're stoned - are real insights!
One thing I did while me and my friend was high on n2o was too see how sure I was one the things I said, I said to my friend "we ARE all one" and it was with such confidence I couldn't be wrong. I invited him all the time to disprove me and he couldn't, he was "out there" spacing around tryin' to fight his own fears. Sometimes it seemed entities entered and left his body, and I felt this experience the first time I did n2o on cannabis earlier this year, which was the 2nd time ever. From that experience and my first I realised that n2o makes you become your fantasy, or what you're thinkin' about. So I have experienced being god and being the devil - and even if its my fantasy, it was an ephiphany.
Another intresting story I heard, was that of a guy that from an LSD trip saw and built a circuit board, he also tested it in his trip. When he came back he tried it, sadly the story didn't tell if it worked in "real-life" for him. The fun thing though is that me and my friend discussed this. And after we had been lizards (2times) he started to not be able to be a lizard again. It was like he almost believed that we were one and could do anything! But he wasn't ready and that's because he was afraid. And at a point I knew why, I told him "hey I know why you're afraid, just ask me and I tell you". He never asked me a specific question, and when he did I started to come down and realise that he must solve his own problems before he can see the Matrix. But he learned alot and started to stop thinking of doing drugs just to "have fun" or escape reality, when they sometimes can take you close to it. Its just that, you must understand what you're doing and to be responsible at all times! Still its free will and when you don't violate free will you're all clear. That's why the light side never can die
.I've grown and I've faced my fears, and I've been evolving inside, so I can blossom and come clear on this forum on what I've come to understand - cause there has to be people out there like me
I want to know what the plans are to wake "us" up. I mean before I really got this far I've been learning how to overthrow the goverment by their own evil scheme. And when I learned to be fearless but smart/intelligent, I started to understand that "they" - thoose that says we're separate and that manipulate us - never can stop me or give me a good reason for why I would be wrong with my arguments. I don't want to argue what I know, cause its only what I know, and I can't say what I know is the truth. If I say that, its because its my truth. You choose your truth, and that's why I don't argue. You always have your own free will to follow your own beliefs!I've also faced sometimes that its possible for me while on heavy mind altering drugs such as LSD, to leave this body and be somewhere else. But I've never really stepped out, only onetime on Salvia. Then I was nowhere and in another dimension. I just was, and I was so sure that it was another dimension, and that theese did exist, but back in thoose days I didn't have the information about what I know today. So it was a just a trip but that left me thinkin' bout life and what's behind it. So I wonder what happens to me on salvia if I do it today? Cannabis and N20 are my favorites so far, and LSD I did to test to see if multiple realities really can exist.. I got some weird reactions on that and proof for me that multiple realities do exist. I couldn't tell reality apart from reality and it was a mess, but I knew it was all going to be ok, and it is ok
. I came down from LSD booth times I tried it with tears and with vibrations all over my body and a feeling that everything is beatuiful and everything will be ok . I will not try LSD again, just because I don't believe in drugs to escape this reality, this is THE reality I want to be living in . I only smoke cannabis to stay in touch withmyself and to struggle against the pain forced from Babylon onto my mind and body. But I know that one day I won't need to smoke cannabis, and that day could be anyday - but Im a stoner and maybe cannabis is my elixir? Well, its free will, so I guess I create whatever it is for me, time will tell.. A year ago I would've thought I've gone crazy, so I guess there's a reason I write about this in such detail now. I could bring in alot of other things such as Law of Attraction and synchronizity that have helped me see that I do have more power over life than I thought, also that life has control of me. Universe seem to line up things and this only makes it easier for me to understand that we all really are one. Its one thing to say it, and one thing to know it.I started writing this with migraine, but I've smoked more grass, and I've come to sense with what I've experienced, and my migraine is not as intense. Have I further calmed my brain? Did it "reprogram"? What is migraine really? How come I only get it thinkin' of lifes deep mysteries, and when Im "waking" up to Infinite Awareness? I have stopped with all medecine that's not herbal, so cannabis have really helped me find a way to be myself as the avatar I choose to experience in life.
A very good question my friend asked me, which didn't prove to him that we all are one, was when he asked me: "Ok, what is the best and most coolest drug to take". I said "Your Brain!" and I was away on n2o and I felt so sure that its your brain of course, and all he wanted to do was escape reality, I wanted to understand it. And the brain is the most awesome tool we got, and we can influence it with drugs, it can also create its own drugs. I would like to say that life sort of is an addiction.. Guess it needs more explanation than that, but I'll try to keep it not too long, so I'll skip it.
I would like to come to the conclusion that consioussness is just programmed. And it all strings from information. That's why 2012 is so cool, cause you could be cosmos if you like. But you could also create your own little reality world with your friends, but also we will be one and understand that we all are one. And then we can live in a world that is awesome. So awesome I can't imagine it fully, but I can understand this: When Im peaking on N2O and Cannabis - at that moment Im IT ALL. I am the Consioussness then, but only after how I express it. Cause I am an expression of myself, just like you are.
And we are here to express ourselves and live our lives. I've kinda not lived my life like ordinary people do, cause ordinary people don't contemplate theese things and they don't say its all a coded string
.The trick that the devil pulled was to make you believe he didn't exist. Of course he does, he's the negative, and the expressions of it. And we all mix with our expressions, like fear, hate, anger, sadness, anxiety are negative and happiness, curiousity, love, understanding are positive. We are the mix of all this, and therefore we all are unique and different but still the same at the source.
And theese expressions are what we are. We are just an expression of a way to experience life. And my expression is pretty daamn sneaky I understand know. I'm forced to split personality cause I've been doing work as a stoner disguised as a normal middle class everyday Joe
. So I got the best of two words for my expression. I have since a kid always had the feeling that I shouldn't do whatever everyone else do, so I've kinda walked my own yellowbrick road learning from mine and others mistakes. I've also learned from all and been objective about what I keep as truth. And if Im wrong, Im very fast to admit it and change my point of view.You can't be my expression, cause then you and I would be the same. So what happens is that we wake up to our own expression and that we all are one. I wonder if laziness is negative or positive, I do believe it mixes a little of booth, and that's what we always do. We balance, we are YING and YANG.
That's why we can be everything and still be humans on this planet, in this moment. The moment is just an illusion, and does it matter? Nah
I live with my brain 'til I get tired of it.Peace and love and alot of light !!
NOTE. I did write this on the night after that mad mad day, and I realised I couldn't post until I had read it, so I did it the day after (today). I was awake and energized the whole night, and I feel high today, but know I have more to learn, and I have to continue to fight the system with all plans I have. Also for all of thoose that think Im a lunatic and madman, or that I got a psychosis. I'm fine, no need to worry about me, care about yourself instead and care about your life and your friends and family. Never forget that love is what we all need and by love I mean acceptance and understanding. Respect everyone and their opinions, that's why I don't argue cause I accept your opinion - even if I don't agree.
